long delayed post
At 1:40 AM on
Friday, October 20, 2006
1) i didn't wana blog about how sucky i feel during work (more on that later)
2) i didn't wana blog about the arguement that me and kenneth had (details on that also later)
3) the whole accumulation of emotions would be so over whelming that i would probably start cursing at myself and regretting my decision to come korea. (yet again)
so firstly, work.
i felt probably the second worse feeling i had since staring work last week because i had to work E shift for 2 days because of my dad. he had to make a trip to korea to renew his visa so because of him, i had to change my usual work timing to an earlier time so that at least i didn't wake up at freaking 4 am to get to work at 6.
so i placed work for E shift which was from 9am to 6pm, the usual 'office hours'. so because of this out-of-ordinary schedule for two days, i felt so drained from the previous day's work cos i normally end at 10. which means i reach home around 11 odd.
which also means i only start to get sleepy around 2 or 3am cos i can sleep in till about 1030 before leaving home.
but because i didn't have a break of one day rest before doing the 9 to 6 shift, i couldn't sleep, then i woke up at 6 the next morning, or rather, that same morning and got my butt to work.
alas, at work, i had to endure 2 freaking days of seeing this senior of mine which made my mornings and afternoons so freaking annoying.
it's ok if you don't wana talk to me you know.
but you could just stick to not speaking to me, AT ALL rather than speak only a few words to me and not being polite to me AT ALL.
it pisses me off.
i'm sorry.
oh hold on.
why am i apologising anyway?
i am not sorry at all. that's how i feel. that's how i am.
i am usually a very controlled person at work. i've been handling the language barrier thing quite well this month or so here. i'm being very polite and couteous with my actions and words because that's how the others behave so i figured i had to conform to the culture's norms of the hotel.
but seeing and feeling how that senior of mine actually treated me, just makes it so annoying.
so anyway i've came to a conclusion about work.
i would only work B shift which is the usual 2 to 10pm because i feel better working that shift cos i'm more familiar with the people in that shift.
and we all know that when you feel more confortable, you feel better.
and when you feel better, you work better.
and when you work better, you feel more accomplished.
and when you feel more accomplished, you forget about stuffs that makes you unhappy.
so that's what i intend to do for the coming time here in korea.
but alas
(why does there always have to be a big BUT after getting a good conclusion or solution?)
anyway i heard from one of my colleague that i might have to do the morning shift next month onwards because 3 trainees are ending their internship already. god help me.
i'll try to talk to my supervisor and see how we can arrange the schedule. -fingers crosssed-
next, kenneth.
for the last week and even maybe for the previous one, we hadn't been talking much. phone or msn. cos he's busy with work already and my internship is also taking up my time. felt the accumulation of emotions in me but i didn't voice out anything.
this is me.
although it's vital that i tell about how i felt, i just hate asking and getting things from people or asking people to do things for me.
maybe that's why i put in so much for projects (SU ones) and meetings.
i hate turning people down or asking favours from people.
not that i'm a snob or anything but when i can do it myself,
why do i have to trouble people right?
anyways, so we had an argument on msn. but it's ok already. we sorted it out.
lastly the whole accumulation of emotions ended up with me regretting my decision to come korea.
at times i really do ponder and wonder to myself if coming here was a good choice.
-curses to self-
see my point people? i repeat myself and it's almost like i hate it here.
in fact i don't.
it's only the few people that makes this experience here so incompleted and beautiful.
but apart from the few odd sheep, all’s really good for me.
in fact i love it here and i can't wait to finish up my internship in the hotel.
because it would mean and symbolise that i've achieved something which i thought was unattainable because the thought of it initially was unfeasible and all.
anyways. i figured that since i'm feeling down, i should have some good rhythm music to keep me high.
this song Summer Jam by Craig David & Artful Dodger is rocking good. though it sounds abit like techno(I HEREBY PROCLAIM THAT I AM NO TECHNO FAN), but i think it's good.
so this song's also in my mp3.
talking about mp3, one of my colleague was telling me that day she got this mp3 for like 30 -50K won. it's probably around S$50-80. it's really small sized and very compact. so people i forgot about how much an mp3 costs back in singapore already.
so is it reasonable? was thinking of getting it for my bro or something.
then i would probably mail it back with other things for my mum and sis too.
so can someone please tell me if the price is reasonable?
i would ask my colleague where she got the mp3 player from tmr when i'm going for work.
by the way i've changed skin.
but the picture is too small for my liking though. in LOVE,
pr social butterfly pam